All it takes is one step every day…

I’ll admit, I am an inconsistent bum. I’ve half-assed almost everything in my life. Why is that? I failed to stick to the goals I set for myself every day. If I feel tired, stressed out, bored, unhappy about something unproductive, comparing myself to others’ successes, and lack faith to stay committed, I end up burying my future for comfort and inevitable failure.

The problem is that I see the same levels of mediocrity in my life because I don’t give a real damn about being more than who I’ve been. I started reading David Goggins’ book Never Finished, and what I’ve gathered from his life experiences is how much potential I have. Untapped potential like Gohan from Dragon Ball Z.

Everyone has it, yet how he explains it really speaks to the core of my insecurities. I lived my life feeling useless and incompetent because of the identities I wore as a badge of woe-is-me.

There’s an insufferable fiend called self-sabotage who isn’t a good friend of mine. I thought it would be a friend saving me from a pitfall of disasters, but oh boy, had I been wrong on too many occasions. Many opportunities and relationships blasted away to kingdom come by the old self-sabotage for the sake of false security and safety. When reality appeared clearer to me, I realized how spineless and weak I’ve been.

Waking up to the harshness of being pathetic wasn’t anything harsh for me; it had been an opening to getting myself out of the self-published prison I wrote into existence – reflecting a reality I crafted over decades. You know what they say: you are your own worst foe. Sabotaging your life is a sign of hating yourself. Only a villain would do such a thing, and that individual lived rent-free in my cerebrum.

Going back to the above statement, all it takes is one step every day towards being powerful, joyful, compassionate, driven, committed, and alive. And am I going to get those trait snacks under my belt? I’ve known this answer for years, but my lazy excuse-driven mindset is the killer of my progression. As Optimus Prime would say: “We suffered losses, but we’ve not lost the war.”